Couples can experience challenges in their relationship at any point in time. Spouses and partners can find themselves struggling to feel the connection they once did, or perhaps they are finding it challenging to talk about specific topics of importance for one or both people in the relationship.
At Philippe Jacquet & Associates, we can work with couples in all our office locations on aspects of their relationship that are challenging or creating distance and discomfort. Philippe Jacquet, MA, is a UKCP, BAAT and HCPC accredited psychotherapist and is also highly experienced in assisting couples to address areas of struggle within a relationship.
Determining when to seek help for couples counselling from a central London psychotherapist can sometimes be a challenge itself. Often one person in the relationship sees the need for support from a therapist while the other person is reluctant to participate.
The key signs of difficulties in a relationship that will benefit from professional support from a trained, empathetic yet neutral therapist can be easy to identify. Often couples seeking help from Mr. Jacquet are trying to deal with multiple difficulties and, despite wanting to change; they are stuck in behavioural ruts that simply create a never-ending downward cycle.
Challenges in Communication
It is not uncommon for couples to have difficulty in communication, particularly about topics that are emotionally charged or have caused arguments in the past. Having a psychotherapist or counsellor assisting the individuals to change their communication styles can allow couples to break out of that pattern of hostility and volatility to being able to speak, listen and be heard.
Trying to change communication patterns without help is very difficult. After all, when we are stressed we return to old habits, and it isn’t a time to try things that may be outside of our comfort zone. With a safe, supportive environment and the assistance of a couples counsellor changes can be made and the couple can develop healthy and effective communication patterns for a much stronger relationship.
Negativity and Anger
When one or both people in a relationship feel unloved, unappreciated, distrusted or unimportant anger and negativity will develop. Over time, these feelings become more prominent and pronounced, and all that the couple is able to communicate is dissatisfaction and negativity towards the relationship and to each other.
Exploring how these negative patterns developed, and making changes in the current relationship, allows the couple to accurately see each other, and themselves, and how they contribute to the marriage or partnership.
This, in turn, develops the feeling of working towards mutual goals and desires. Instead of working against each other, the counsellor can help the couple to set mutually agreeable goals and work towards them in unison and by supporting each other.
Secrets and Lies
When communication breaks down in a relationship and there is negativity, anger and feelings of being alone in a marriage or partnership, secrets and lies are typically also involved.
This can include online activity, spending money secretly, having affairs, making excuses to not spend time with the partner or spouse or any other number of behaviours. Once this pattern is established, the couple needs counselling and assistance to rebuild the trust and to work to become a couple again, letting go of the past and working towards creating a better present and future.
The Process of Couples Counselling
At Philippe Jacquet & Associates couples counselling is completed with confidentiality and privacy. This provides the couple with the safe environment to explore their relationship in the past, but to also turn the focus to the future. Through addressing challenges together in a safe, supportive and focused process trust, communication, conflict resolution, problem-solving and addressing future boundaries and relationship guidelines all become possible.
The counsellor works with each couple on a unique programme, carefully crafted to match the needs of the couple. Through talk, exercises, role play and exploration the couple will develop their own outcomes. They will discover the most effective ways to relate and interact with each other, as well as learning skills in interpersonal communication, conflict resolution and problem solving that can be used in all other aspects of their life.
In some situations, one or both people involved in couples counselling may want to work on individual issues as well. Philippe Jacquet & Associates, as top psychotherapists in London, can also accommodate those needs, assisting the individual to address personal issues as required through individual psychotherapy or counselling.