Close your eyes. Now open them to read the rest of this article. Think about someone who does a comb-over poorly. The one who jumps out in my mind, and quite possibly you think of as well is Donald Trump. The billionaire real estate tycoon has some of the most atrocious hair in human existence and it primarily emanates from that sickly comb-over he chooses to don.
While it has become irreplaceably woven into his personality and being, it is an enigma why exactly he continues to fix his northern nest in the most unattractive ways possible, but as your public school teachers always said, “Being unique is a good thing. No one else is like you.” Hardly.
Does any comb-over look good? Ehhh.
You’ve likely seen balding middle age men try to cover up male pattern baldness using the horizontal comb-over technique. If you haven’t, I included a picture as reference, above. Especially with thin-haired balding guys, this is an easy way to look the part as a stereotypical “creeper” as the young ones call it. I remember my old high school biology teacher did this exact hairstyle and this is all we would say about him.
Turns out the fuzz picked him up a few years after I graduated after he took a liking to some underage high school girls. This is the type of aura you have with a horizontal comb-over. No balding male looks good with it and if you’d like to appeal my claim please send me an email with the photograph. Don’t do the horizontal comb-over, especially as a guy with thin hair, like me.
Now we have the vertical comb-back. It works well with those guys on television such as Alec Baldwin, David Beckham, and Bradley Cooper, so that means it’s a free for all for all men to try right? Well to answer this question in short, it kind of depends. If you’ve got enough hair to completely cover up what you’re combing over, the comb-back can function as a viable hairstyle solution. If you’ve got thinning hair (especially lighter-colored thinning hair), ask your wife or daughter to be the judge.
The messy hair look is all the rage with the hipsters of today. For a balding male and unless you’re driving running around in a DeLorean, the messy-haired, genius/scientist look isn’t one to attract a ton of compliments. If you’re just not into the whole doing-your-hair-in-the-morning, wear a baseball cap for 20 minutes before work, and at least your hair will look somewhat kept. At least you aren’t spending much time on it.
Just a reminder, hair restoration procedures or toupees are always on the table.
If you aren’t aware of it already, some preteen youngsters spend more time on their hair these days than they do on their homework. Using all sorts of fancy gels and products while they stand in the mirror and take selfie pictures of themselves to post all over their FaceSpace or MyBook or whatever social media outlet they spend hours on every day.
The older you get, the more time you spend on your hair the worse it’s going to get. Using a comb-over to hide the inevitable (old age, hair loss) is a silly attempt that’ll only make an older gentleman look that much worse. When fixing up the scruff, don’t overthink and keep it simple. Ask the wife or daughter what they think, and if they’ll willingly be seen out in public with you it’s all systems go and time to take back the dignity you lost by attempting to solve male pattern baldness with a comb-over.
Featured images:
License: Royalty Free or iStock
source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/chimpanzape/2867613965/in/pool-combovers
By day, Brett Collins is a content creator for the Mosaic Hair Transplant world. By night he is a sports addict that has no plans of attending sports rehab anytime soon.